some really corny stuff to read if you are bored.

by **Doreen** September 29th 2009, 6:44 pm

Wedding Announcement

Nick Faldo's old caddy Fanny Sunesson is to marry Masters champion V J Singh.

At the press conference, V J Singh commented, "I'm hoping to make her Fanny Singh by Christmas".
.....................................

One night a blonde nun was praying in her room when God appeared before her.
"My daughter, you have pleased me greatly. Your heart is full of love
for your fellow creatures and your actions and prayers are always for
the benefit of others. I have come to you, not only to thank and commend
you, but to grant you anything you wish," said God.
"Dear Heavenly Father, I am perfectly happy. I am a bride of Christ.
I am doing what I love. I lack for nothing material since the Church
supports me. I am content in all ways," said the nun.
"There must be something you would have of me," said God.
"Well, there is one thing," she said.
"Just name it," said God.
"It's those blonde jokes. They are so demeaning to blondes everywhere,
not just to me. I would like for blonde jokes to stop."
"Consider it done," said God. "Blonde jokes shall be stricken from the
minds of humans everywhere. But surely there is something that I could
do just for you."
"There is one thing. But it's really small, and not worth your time,"
said the nun.
"Name it. Please," said God.
"It's the M&M's," said the nun. "They're so hard to peel..."
-----------------------------

A woman broke up with me and sent me pictures of her and her new boyfriend in bed together. Solution? I sent them to her dad.

A lady came up to me on the street and pointed at my suede jacket. 'You know a cow was murdered for that jacket?' she sneered. I replied in a psychotic tone, 'I didn't know there were any witnesses. Now I'll have to kill you too.

"If your parents never had children, chances are you won't either."

"My mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat. I said, 'Mom, they weren't trying to teach you how to swim.'"

"In elementary school, in case of fire you have to line up quietly in a single file line from smallest to tallest. What is the logic? Do tall people burn slower?"